The River

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These are Kenny and my baby shoes.  Somehow they seem appropriate today because our mother, Leatrice Roffe, died early on Tuesday morning.

No matter what her death certificate says, let me make this very clear.

She didn’t die from the broken hip, a stroke or heart failure.

She died as a direct result of her mental illness.

This is a terrible affliction.  It ruined her life.

And blighted mine.

We can only pray that at long last, at very long last, she is at peace.

Most of you know that she was a crack card player.  A real shark.

There was no game at which she didn’t excel.  Poker, Bridge, Hearts, Casino, Canasta, Pan, Craps, the Slots, Roulette, Bingo- for Pete’s sake- she always had the winning hand.

Her acumen and risk-taking nature made her a stock market ace, too.  To the very last, she wanted to know how the Market was doing.

We buried her yesterday with her purse, a deck of cards, her driver’s license, a gift card for McDonald’s Arch Club and a schedule for her underground poker game.

I wish I could tell you that she is in Heaven with her beloved mother and father.

But I know better.

She’s in the High Roller’s Room at the Big Casino.

And she’s all in.

Wishing you nothing but royal flushes, Mom.

Love and luck from Kenny and Ellen

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45 Responses to The River

  1. My condolences, Ellen. That must have been hard to write … but I’ll bet (deliberate word choice) it has been on your mind for a very long time. Glad you could keep your sense of humor at a time like this.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Thanks, Doc. Your kind words were appreciated. Hey, by any chance do you have a crossword puzzle about games of chance?

  2. Diane Freeman says:

    Sorry to hear this, Ellen. May she rest in peace. Hugs,Dianexxxooo

  3. Mary Lu Roffe says:

    Perfectly said. Love, me

  4. Ellen kander says:

    My Dad sent his condolences along with mine and said he remembers her sitting on the driveway playing her guitar!!! She was a character for sure but she did love you & Kenny
    …. Just had a strange way of showing it. She is now at peace & so are both of you…

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Thanks, Ellen, and thank Lou for us. He’s right about the guitar-playing. She broke it over me, too, once. She had to have it fixed! It’s going to pretty quiet around here from now on. But we’ll take it! 😊

  5. Judy Lynch says:

    I’m so sorry, Ellen. I’m glad our reminiscences when we met included your mom.

  6. Mitchell Klein says:

    My deepest condolences Ellen on your loss.

  7. John Yager says:

    Rest in peace, “Jean.” (As in “The Lady Eve.”)

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Amen. What a gal. What a movie. “Positively the same dame.” Thanks, Hopsy. 🎲🎲♦️♥️♣️♠️

  8. Dicky Paull says:

    Condolences Ellen and Kenny. Hope you can enjoy recalling any of the good times. Thank you for sharing your thoughts w us. Here’s I thought. I can’t stand Jim Belushi.

  9. Michael McCoy says:

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss.

    Losing a parent is difficult, but losing the person who brought you into this world can be especially difficult, no matter our age.

    My mom died in 2010. I am still making discoveries about her life 6 years later, discoveries of a myriad varieties, most of them good, just unknown to me until now.

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Blessings.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Thank you so much, Michael. You’re right on about losing a parent. It’s a tough nut to deal with- pun intended- but it’s been made easier by friends like you. Blessings right back at ya.

  10. Lili says:

    So sorry Ellen. I hope your mom is dealing a hand to my mom and still winning.
    Your humor always makes me smile. Your mom did a lot of great things. You and Kenny
    would be her greatest achievements.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Aw, Lil. Thank you. And I bet that would be some hot card game. I miss your mother. She was quite a gal. As is her daughter. 😘

  11. Very sorry for your loss Ellen and Kenny. My deepest condolences to you and your family. 💐

  12. Lynn Howard says:

    So sorry for your loss. Hopefully your mom’s teaching them a thing or to at the BIG CASINO & having a good time. Thoughts. & prayers are with you & your family.

  13. Ken Roffe says:

    Well said. RIP Mother.

  14. Nancy Cutler says:

    So sorry to hear of your loss Ellen…never easy. Sending warm hugs.💋💋

  15. Jack C. Feldman says:

    Ellen — My sincere condolences to you and your family on the death of your Mother. I have read how difficult it was for you, so perhaps this is some kind of sad relief for you. My father succumbed to Ahlzheimer’s Disease late in his life, so I know a little about the terrible consequences of mental illness.

    During his life, my father was perhaps happiest playing blackjack or throwing dice at a craps table in Las Vegas; I think he would have made Caesar’s Palace a second home if he could have afforded it. Perhaps he and your Mother had more than just a little in common.

  16. Steve Wolff says:

    My condolences go out to you and your family. I will deal with this in my usual way…twisted poetry.

    Our parents die first,
    That’s the order of things.
    We hope they go out,
    While wearing those wings.

    How we find out,
    has certainly changed,
    It was word of mouth,
    Today that seems strange

    We used to read obits,
    In our local town news,
    Right after the comics,
    And the newspaper’s views.

    But life now is different,
    We read them on line,
    I guess time moves on,
    That will have to be fine.

    Today we read death,
    At the end of a text,
    The scary thing is, pal,
    We’re generation next!

    Ellen, I hope your Mom is finally at peace.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Classy, Steve. A real tribute to her- and the problems of aging. Thank you so much for this wonderful poem.

  17. Steve Gersten says:

    Your mom was definitely a character, and despite everything, it’s tough losing her. My condolences to you and Kenny.

    Steve Gersten

  18. Richard Schrenzel says:

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you.

  19. Ted Schnell says:

    Sorry for your loss Ellen. And, as you know I have personal insight into her troubled ending times and the stress to her family. Continue to remember her at her best, and embrace the relief that her bad times are over. Ted.

  20. Steven W Lindeman says:

    I know I am late to your blog, but I want to tell you I am sorry for your loss E. I did not know your Mom, but just know she is in a better place now. Take care.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Not late, Steve. And I really appreciate your thoughts and kind words. Nice to have friends like you at a time like this.

  21. Vivian Kramer says:

    Loren and I send our condolences to you and Kenny. It is hard to loose a parent regardless of your history. Our thoughts are with you.

    • Ellen Ross says:

      Dear dear Vivian, love and thanks to all the Kramer clan. You make my life a better place to be. See you at Post.

  22. Bernard Kerman says:

    Ellen,
    Just got this copy of your blog. So Sorry………
    “I want to live as long as possible, but die young”!!

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