One week ago, people here in Chicagoland were shocked and horrified as an ugly news story unfolded.
ICYMI: Four black teenagers- two boys and two girls- kidnapped and tormented- “tortured” was the word the news outlets used- a mentally handicapped white eighteen year old from the western suburbs. After the abduction, the captors kicked and hit him, cut his clothes, slashed his scalp and forced him to drink water from a toilet.
If that was sickening enough, they put the whole horrific incident up on Facebook.
The group could be seen taunting and physically assaulting the victim.
And they laughed and cursed throughout the entire clip.
Officers finally found this poor young man wandering around in frigid temperatures. He was disoriented and bleeding and the policeman who discovered him called an ambulance.
The victim was treated at a hospital and then released.
Of course I was appalled.
And so were you if you heard about it.
I thought,
“There were girls involved…?”
But…
This has been much on my mind lately.
Girls bullying.
Sure, I know. This is an extreme example of teenage mob mentality run amok.
No well-brought up, right-thinking child of yours or mine would EVER have participated in anything as shameful as this.
But I can’t get on my high horse.
I have to be honest.
When we were young girls, we participated in another kind of bullying.
Shunning.
Sure, we never deliberately physically attacked someone or made direct fun of their disabilities.
But what we did was just as powerful.
I remember this so clearly.
If a girl was unattractive, or slow mentally, or overweight, or different somehow, we didn’t call her names or make fun of her.
(To her face.)
We just froze her out.
We never spoke to her or included her in any of our fun and games.
There were girls in my junior high who NEVER got invited to the birthday parties or sleepovers.
They just didn’t exist on our social radar screen.
And I don’t think any amount of pleading or consciousness-raising on the part of concerned parents about these poor kids would have made any difference.
Kids are mean.
Especially girls.
Politically Incorrect Sidebar: I know. I know. But in my experience, it was often the boys who were more tolerant of the kids who were unusual. The girls were the ones who were judgmental and cruel.
I truly think it’s a fear of “the other” that is hard-wired into human DNA.
When I became a parent, I tried to instill decent “Love thy neighbor” and Golden Rule values into my kids. But if they “didn’t like” someone, they still wouldn’t invite them over to play.
I could not legislate acceptance.
I think about this a lot. If you have any better ideas, let me know.
All lives matter, sure.
But it seems, that some matter just a little bit less than others.
BTW, I wrote this post before the Golden Globes but the timing is perfect.
And so I’ll let my cousin Joanie’s friend, the divine Meryl, have the last word on the subject here.
Baloney!!
This “torture’ was not the typical bullying. It was propagated by, and the seeds were laid from the top. Yes, I mean Barack Obama! His divisiveness from almost day one in the White House and his “Police acted stupidly” comments regarding the Connecticut police, among other dumb statements, without knowing any facts, goes a long way to the deteriorating race relations we have seen the last eight years.
The false narrative of “Hands up, don’t shoot” and Obama’s refusal to denunciate the Black Lives Matter narrative of “What do we want. Dead cops. When do we want them? Now”!, goes a long way for “bullies” like these four to believe it’s all right.
His (Obama’s) inaction (red line in Syria, etc) and other naïve moves in the Mideast has placed the world in perilous times.
It’s not unlike his decision to abstain when it came to the U.N. resolution regarding Israel two weeks ago.
As far as the “divine” Meryl Streep and her other left-wing friends in Hollywood are concerned, who the hell cares what these phonies think?
It’s not soon enough that Obama’s tenure as our Commander-In-Chief is coming to an end in 8 days. He begged the nation to vote for Hillary to “ensure my legacy is confirmed”. Well, he lost big time!!
Bernie, as you know, you and I do not agree politically. But I appreciate the fact that you do not denounce this forum as “fake” or “over-rated.” And in the hands-across-the-aisle spirit in enlightened democracy, I publish this comment. And most respectfully say,”No comment.”
Ellen — You are clearly a much better person than I to publish the comments of Bernard Kerman and to abstain from responding.Whatever disagreements one might have with Barack Obama — and legitimate arguments can be made for many — how any sane person can make the President responsible for what these four young people did is completely incomprehensible. I am certain that Mr. Kerman is intelligent and probably quite successful — but my goodness. The culture and the country seems to be coming apart.
This is an equal opportunity blog, Jack. I – and you- don’t have to agree with Bernie but we must defend to the death his right to say it. Thanks for this comment. Good to have both sides represented.
I wonder if Bernie thinks that since Trump is the opposite of Obama, if Trump’s name calling and bullying will bring the country together. Scandal free, conflict of interest free, informed, smart and thoughtful versus the irrational bully… how can anyone think this is better?
I’ve got my fingers crossed, Vivian, that this thoughtful comment won’t start another controversy. I’ve been held accountable by both sides of the aisle and nothing I’ve done with this comment section has been well received. Wish me luck. Politics is hard. 🙏😊